Stuff and Things

Published on January 27th, 2015 | by Denise Borders

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Mr. Coffee vs. Coffee Mug: Who Brewed the Better Song?

It’s almost 19 years in the making but the battle is finally here: Who brewed the better song between Lagwagon’s Mr. Coffee and the Decendents’ Coffee Mug? Let’s compare some facts about the two tracks.

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Lagwagon – Mr. Coffee
Record: Duh (1992)

Lyrics:

Morning has broken
Mr. Coffee has spoken
The familiar wake-up call
Sings to my ears
I wake up with a shrug
To the floor with a thud
Where in this hellhole is my coffee mug?
I can now face the day
On legal speed (The American way)
I’m sketching
I’m seizin
I’m spazing
I’m shaking
I can not stop spilling on my brand new shirt
I-I-I’m wired
I’m so inspired
I drank the entire pot
So off to work
Here I come to save the day
On legal speed (The American way)
Drinking coffee
I drink coffee
Drinking coffee everyday

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Descendents – Coffee Mug
Record: Everything Sucks (1996)

Lyrics:

Mug Mug Mug
Coffee Mug
Gonna Clear Away The Haze
Liquid Proof
That I Can Win This Race
Coffee Mug
The Grip That Keeps Me Tall
My Inter-Link
Keeps Me Questing All
I Don’t Need No Booze Or Drugs
I Just Chug-A-Lug-O My Coffee Mug
And I Don’r Need Your Kiss And Hug
I Just Chug-A-Lug-O My Coffee Mug
They Haven’T Banned
My Liquid Drug Of Choice
There’s Too Many Hooked
And They’ve Got Too Much Voice
So For The Moment
We’re All Pretty Good To Go
With 98 Cups
With 98 More To Go
I Don’t Need No Booze Or Drugs
I Just Chug-A-Lug-O My Coffee Mug
And I Don’T Need Your Kiss And Hug
I Just Chug-A-Lug-O My Coffee Mug
Here A Bean, There A Bean
Everywhere A Mean Mean
Bean Chug – A – Lug – O – My
Coffee – Mug, Mug, Mug, Mug

***

So seeing the stats above, let’s compare: Mr. Coffee was released four years before Coffee Mug, but comparing the lyrics, I side with the Descendents and their catchy lines like” The Grip That Keeps Me Tall / My Inter-Link / Keeps Me Questing All” and the classic ” Mug, Mug Mug” that Milo recites so perfectly every time.  I will commend Joey for the ending of Mr. Coffee, which I think is the best part of the entire track. But as a whole, I think Coffee Mug is the better track. I love it’s intensity and Mr. Coffee just can’t compete with that.

WINNER: COFFEE MUG

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About the Author

Denise Borders

32, Los Angeles. Denise founded PWV in 2008 and remains the primary manager and photographer/videographer. She thinks the world would be a better place if there were more John Joseph's walking around.



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